Hanuman swung through the trees, on the hunt for something
delicious to eat. His father was the mighty Vayu, the wind god, of the world.
His mother was named Anjana, but she had abandoned Hanuman shortly after his
birth, when he was still a baby monkey. In the absence of his mother, Hanuman
had no one to teach him the things he was supposed to eat and the things he was
to avoid eating since his father was so busy throughout the day making wind for
people in need. Hanuman didn’t really know the difference between dangerous and
safe as a young monkey. All he knew was that sometimes there was tasty fruit
hanging from the branches of the trees, ready to be picked off and eaten.
This day, it was taking especially long for Hanuman to find food.
The longer he swung through the trees, the more tired and careless he became.
This proved to be harmful because Hanuman accidentally swung from one tree and
grabbed the branch of another tree that was very thin and weak. The branch
snapped in half instantly and down went Hanuman…
As Hanuman woke up in a daze, his head and body aching from the
impact he made on the ground, he noticed an orange circle through the canopy of
leaves above him. It looked oddly like a mango to him. Hanuman grew more
excited by the second, thinking he had finally found food! What he thought was
a mango was actually the sun out in the distance, ready to set. Hanuman
reached out for the “mango,” licking his chops, eager to eat, when Vayu stopped
him from burning himself in the nick of time!
“Don’t touch that!” Vayu roared, causing Hanuman to falter and
tumble to the ground.
Hanuman looked up at his father with a confused expression on his face
because he still thought the sun was a mango.
“That’s not a mango, you clown. That is the sun and you will burn
yourself if you touch it,” said Vayu.
Author's Note: I
just took the story of Hanuman and expanded on it a little bit. I
thought it would be a good idea to describe the story of how Hanuman thought
the sun was a mango in more detail. I imagined him being a clueless, innocent
little monkey who didn’t even know the basics of finding food. Vayu, being the
wind god, doesn't have much time to look after Hanuman so he doesn't get very
much guidance. He always gets into some kind of trouble and has to learn from his countless mistakes.
The picture I used for this story assignment was pretty much perfect because it depicts basically my whole story into that one picture. It's Hanuman reaching for a mango (which is actually the sun in the distant sky). I don't think I could have found a better picture for this story.
I chose to write this story because I thought it would be a funny story to write. I knew by adding in some choice vocabulary and depicting Hanuman as an innocent baby monkey, I could get a lighthearted, comical story. At the same time, I wanted to show how Hanuman uses his mistakes as learning experiences and how his father still teaches him even though he's pretty busy. I liked how it turned out overall.
The picture I used for this story assignment was pretty much perfect because it depicts basically my whole story into that one picture. It's Hanuman reaching for a mango (which is actually the sun in the distant sky). I don't think I could have found a better picture for this story.
I chose to write this story because I thought it would be a funny story to write. I knew by adding in some choice vocabulary and depicting Hanuman as an innocent baby monkey, I could get a lighthearted, comical story. At the same time, I wanted to show how Hanuman uses his mistakes as learning experiences and how his father still teaches him even though he's pretty busy. I liked how it turned out overall.
Bibliography: Buck, William (1976). Ramayana: King Rama's Way.
Hanuman mistakes the sun for a mango; Wikipedia |
Parth, you did a great job on your story! I think it is cute that Hanuman was just a clueless little monkey, unable to tell the difference between the setting sun and a mango! You did a great job with imagery! I specifically like the detail when you say, “he notices an orange circle through the canopy of leaves above him.” Great job! I look forward to reading more from you as the semester continues!
ReplyDeleteParth! Great story you have here! I love the picture you inserted. I actually included that picture in one of my diary post because it was so cute! You did a great job describing the scene and also using descriptive words to explain the details of the story. Hanuman is such a unique and interesting character. I enjoyed reading your story.
ReplyDeleteHi, Parth! I really enjoyed reading your story about Hanuman and the “mango”! I especially like that you used the phrase “licking his chops” hahaha. I’m not really fond of monkeys, (bad experiences, ask me later), but this story made Hanuman seem like such a cutie! At first he seems so clueless, helpless really. But thanks to Vayu worrying about him, he gets to live eternally. I don’t know how I would feel about having eternal life. As they say, all good things must come to an end. Or maybe I heard it from a Nelly Furtado song, who knows. Anyway, your diction was great and kept me interested in reading more. It makes me kind of sad that Hanuman didn’t have anyone to really look up to in his life. Especially now that he has been granted eternal life, I feel like he’s just going to keep on getting into trouble instead of learning from his mistakes. I think the lessons best learned are the ones we learn from our mistakes.
ReplyDeleteThis story was so nice to read. I love how you describe Hunuman as this little confused cute monkey. I also enjoyed the fact that you included his lineage about his mother’s abandonment. Hunuman is so cute in this story, reaching for the mango. Young and innocent, he had no idea that he was causing such a huge issue in the world when his father decided to stop his job and take care of him. I really liked this story!
ReplyDeleteHey Parth! I loved your story. This scene from the actual book was one of my favorite parts so I'm glad I got to read your version of it. Just a few small suggestions.
ReplyDeleteThe first being where you wrote, "His father was the mighty Vayu, the wind god, of the world." I feel it flows better if you wrote, "His father, the mighty Vayu, was the wind god of the world."
Also, for this part, "Hanuman didn’t really know the difference between dangerous and safe as a young monkey," I think you should add "know the difference between -what was- dangerous and..."
Also, just add "-On- this day, it was taking especially long for Hanuman to find food," to this sentence.
Lastly, I was just wanting to point out that sometimes you switch between past tense and present tense. It might just be best to keep everything in past tense.
Besides those minor details, it was a fun read. I like how his father said "thats not a mango, you clown." That made me laugh, I feel like I can relate to that whenever my own parents catch me doing something stupid and start worrying.
Good story and a good choice for your portfolio!
Hello Parth, I decided to read your portfolio as my free choice for the project commenting assignment. The reason why I chose yours is because. When I clicked on your portfolio, I noticed that in your guide you had who stories that seemed interesting to me, and one of my stories is about Hanuman which is a topic that I chose for one of my portfolio topics too. Your webpage is simple and clean. The black background and white text contrast each other pretty well. If I may suggest, you should consider writing a brief maybe one or two lines of a description of what your story will be about just so the reader can have the chance so see what each story will be about. Other than that everything looks fine to me with your portfolio page.
ReplyDeleteI decided to read your second story “Hanuman.” To my surprise you decided to write about his birth story just like I did. There is something magical I believe about this part of the Ramayana because it is so funny and magical. I told my story as a bed time story, but I enjoyed how you told it from a more realistic perspective. Hanuman learned from is mistakes as a baby and he turned out to be a great helper of Rama.
Hey Parth!
ReplyDeleteGreat job on your story! I think this portion of the Ramayana is really interesting. First off, how on earth does Hanuman mistake the sun for a mango? I don't know what color the sun was in ancient India, but I definitely do not mistake the color of a mango for the color of the sun. Although maybe with the amount of smog I inhale and see in New Delhi these days, I can sympathize a little more, ha! The whole story of his birth is fascinating, and I am glad that you decided to expand on it!
I really don't have any corrections to give you, because everyone else has touched on those things. But, I really like your story and am glad that I have gotten to keep up with your portfolio! I look forward to reading the rest of your stories. Best of luck on the rest of your writing!
Hey Parth! Your portfolio looks pretty good to me, but I would recommend a brief little sentence or two in the portfolio post to give a little info about each story. Sometimes a title isn't enough to decide if the story is something a person would be interested in reading. Your blog is very easy to navigate and looks great. The black and white theme is a little plain, but it honestly looks pretty good!
ReplyDeleteI chose to read your story "Hanuman" because he was one of my favorite characters in the Ramayana. You did a good job retelling this story, and you certainly took some creative license with it! In the Ramayana Vayu actually protected Hanuman from burning, and Hanuman ended up biting a Rakshasa who was trying to swallow the sun. I like your version though because it shows that Vayu loves Hanuman and wants to make sure he is safe and knows how to provide for himself. Excellent job on this story!
Hey Parth,
ReplyDeleteHanuman was certainly one of my favorite characters of the Ramayana. I remember the original version of this tale being a but more gruesome and damaging to Hanuman's body, and I really enjoyed the changes that you had implemented. As a reader, I am left wondering whether Anjana was a monkey or a goddess since you only mention her name. We know that Vayu is a god, capable of possibly changing his shape, but I find myself questioning how he came to have a monkey son. Otherwise the flow and content of your story are great. The tale is easy to read, and as you said in your Author's Note, the picture you chose pretty much sums up the plot in one image. One thing I could possibly suggest is placing the picture under the paragraph where Hanuman is on his way in trying to reach the sun. This way, readers will have an immediate visual in what's going on in the story. Great job!